1 00:00:02,102 --> 00:00:03,837 ♪ MTV ♪ 2 00:00:25,292 --> 00:00:26,925 Another way to deter attackers 3 00:00:26,926 --> 00:00:30,963 is by using personal defense devices such as pepper spray. 4 00:00:30,964 --> 00:00:32,867 I happen to have some. 5 00:00:32,967 --> 00:00:34,968 Hmm. I swore it was in here. 6 00:00:36,737 --> 00:00:38,804 It couldn't have just walked away. 7 00:00:40,908 --> 00:00:42,042 Hey, Butt-Head. 8 00:00:42,043 --> 00:00:43,476 What's that stuff we took from the Army guy? 9 00:00:43,477 --> 00:00:45,444 Uh, let's see. 10 00:00:45,445 --> 00:00:46,646 Uh... 11 00:00:46,747 --> 00:00:47,747 Ma-- 12 00:00:47,748 --> 00:00:49,983 mass-- 13 00:00:50,083 --> 00:00:51,918 mass-ay? 14 00:00:51,919 --> 00:00:54,253 Macé. 15 00:00:54,254 --> 00:00:56,323 It must be from France or something. 16 00:00:56,423 --> 00:00:58,525 Yeah, cool. 17 00:00:58,625 --> 00:01:00,426 Monsieur! 18 00:01:00,427 --> 00:01:02,695 Mon soir. 19 00:01:02,696 --> 00:01:04,363 Uh, hmm. 20 00:01:05,732 --> 00:01:08,868 So it's like a little spray bottle from France. 21 00:01:10,170 --> 00:01:12,706 And that cool Army guy had it. 22 00:01:12,806 --> 00:01:14,408 And he looked like he scores. 23 00:01:16,143 --> 00:01:19,646 Whoa, Beavis, this must be cologne. 24 00:01:19,647 --> 00:01:21,481 Yeah, yeah. 25 00:01:21,482 --> 00:01:23,983 Um, what's cologne? 26 00:01:23,984 --> 00:01:26,852 You spray it all over you and then when chicks smell it, 27 00:01:26,853 --> 00:01:30,022 they want to, like, uh, get busy. 28 00:01:30,023 --> 00:01:31,524 Cool! I wanna try it. Yeah. 29 00:01:31,525 --> 00:01:33,259 Maybe I'll score, yeah. 30 00:01:36,197 --> 00:01:37,162 Whoa. 31 00:01:37,163 --> 00:01:38,964 No, that's not it. 32 00:01:38,965 --> 00:01:41,167 I can't find the spray hole. 33 00:01:41,168 --> 00:01:43,303 Let's see. 34 00:01:43,304 --> 00:01:45,171 Oh, yeah, yeah. 35 00:01:45,172 --> 00:01:46,472 Wait, Beavis, stop. 36 00:01:46,473 --> 00:01:47,807 What is it? What? 37 00:01:47,808 --> 00:01:49,709 You said hole. 38 00:01:52,379 --> 00:01:54,780 Oh, yeah. 39 00:01:54,781 --> 00:01:56,515 I guess I did. 40 00:01:56,516 --> 00:01:57,683 Yeah, thanks, Butt-Head. 41 00:01:57,684 --> 00:01:59,386 That was close. 42 00:01:59,486 --> 00:02:01,488 Now, where was I? 43 00:02:04,557 --> 00:02:06,226 Damn it, Beavis. 44 00:02:06,227 --> 00:02:07,227 Stop hogging it. 45 00:02:07,228 --> 00:02:08,295 - Oh, my God. - Butthole. 46 00:02:08,395 --> 00:02:10,330 Give me that. 47 00:02:14,435 --> 00:02:15,435 Oh, Butt-Head. 48 00:02:17,037 --> 00:02:19,038 Is cologne supposed to hurt? 49 00:02:20,540 --> 00:02:22,174 Yeah, dumbass. 50 00:02:22,175 --> 00:02:24,744 That's how you know it's working. 51 00:02:24,745 --> 00:02:27,046 Yeah, but my face feels all hot and stuff. 52 00:02:27,047 --> 00:02:28,949 And--and it hurts to see things. 53 00:02:30,383 --> 00:02:32,952 Well, nobody said scoring was going to feel good. 54 00:02:33,954 --> 00:02:35,254 Oh, yeah, that's true. 55 00:02:35,255 --> 00:02:38,291 I'm gonna score no matter how much it sucks. 56 00:02:38,392 --> 00:02:39,325 Ow! 57 00:02:40,627 --> 00:02:41,828 What was that? 58 00:02:41,928 --> 00:02:44,730 - I don't know. - That was a scream. 59 00:02:44,731 --> 00:02:47,399 What happened? What happened? 60 00:02:47,400 --> 00:02:51,237 See, all of you were talking to a devil. 61 00:02:51,238 --> 00:02:54,141 We are going to be spending the entire night 62 00:02:54,241 --> 00:02:56,275 inside this haunted location. 63 00:02:56,276 --> 00:02:58,778 We are going to be spending the entire night 64 00:02:58,779 --> 00:03:00,947 in this haunted location. 65 00:03:03,617 --> 00:03:05,651 All right, so this was John Stutt's house. 66 00:03:05,652 --> 00:03:07,187 I guess no one told them there's 67 00:03:07,287 --> 00:03:09,655 no such thing as ghosts. 68 00:03:09,656 --> 00:03:11,058 I don't know, Butt-Head. 69 00:03:11,158 --> 00:03:13,092 I saw a ghost once in the middle of the night 70 00:03:13,093 --> 00:03:15,829 when I was a kid, and he told me 71 00:03:15,830 --> 00:03:18,931 that I didn't see him and not to tell anyone. 72 00:03:18,932 --> 00:03:22,869 And then when I woke up, all my mom's pills were gone. 73 00:03:24,504 --> 00:03:26,674 They didn't just disappear on their own. 74 00:03:26,774 --> 00:03:28,542 Uh, OK, Beavis. 75 00:03:28,642 --> 00:03:30,142 What we do know is that John himself 76 00:03:30,143 --> 00:03:31,644 died in here in a chair. 77 00:03:31,645 --> 00:03:33,279 We don't have the chair anymore. 78 00:03:33,280 --> 00:03:34,513 So he died in the living room here. 79 00:03:34,514 --> 00:03:35,883 In the living room. 80 00:03:35,983 --> 00:03:37,116 So he died in the living room. 81 00:03:37,117 --> 00:03:39,686 Was he spanking any type of an animal? 82 00:03:39,787 --> 00:03:42,655 Say, a monkey, perhaps? 83 00:03:44,325 --> 00:03:45,925 This place is haunted with all the girls 84 00:03:45,926 --> 00:03:47,862 he'll never score with. 85 00:03:51,598 --> 00:03:54,068 She's like, if you look in that mirror 86 00:03:54,168 --> 00:03:56,769 and say "I've never scored" three times, 87 00:03:56,770 --> 00:03:58,638 no chicks will appear. 88 00:04:02,175 --> 00:04:04,744 We're gonna leave the camera rolling here, though. 89 00:04:04,844 --> 00:04:07,281 Probably the camera I'm holding. 90 00:04:07,381 --> 00:04:10,349 And we're gonna leave the in here. 91 00:04:10,350 --> 00:04:13,219 He's like, um, if there are any hot chicks in here, 92 00:04:13,220 --> 00:04:15,855 please make yourself known at this time, OK? 93 00:04:17,558 --> 00:04:18,992 I left a kickball here for you 94 00:04:18,993 --> 00:04:21,094 in case you and your friends want to have some fun. 95 00:04:22,129 --> 00:04:24,531 It's my favorite sport. 96 00:04:24,532 --> 00:04:26,499 The fridge is first base. 97 00:04:26,500 --> 00:04:29,168 You know-- 98 00:04:29,169 --> 00:04:30,938 you know, I've never made it to first base. 99 00:04:31,038 --> 00:04:33,139 With a chick or in kickball. 100 00:04:33,140 --> 00:04:34,441 Interesting fact, yeah. 101 00:04:35,710 --> 00:04:36,842 I can catch the kickball pretty good 102 00:04:36,843 --> 00:04:39,145 if you kick it right to me. 103 00:04:42,049 --> 00:04:44,350 - Curtis! - Whoa. 104 00:04:44,351 --> 00:04:45,752 Yeah, I think it did say my name right there. 105 00:04:45,753 --> 00:04:48,288 He's like, you're wrong, Curtis. 106 00:04:48,289 --> 00:04:50,489 No woman will ever say your name. 107 00:04:53,894 --> 00:04:56,529 And you're here somewhere for us? 108 00:04:56,530 --> 00:04:58,731 The ghost is like, tonight, 109 00:04:58,732 --> 00:05:00,768 you will be visited by three ghosts. 110 00:05:00,868 --> 00:05:03,337 the ghost of you're never gonna score past, 111 00:05:03,437 --> 00:05:05,905 the ghost of you're never gonna score present, 112 00:05:05,906 --> 00:05:08,708 and the ghost of you're never gonna score yet to come. 113 00:05:10,578 --> 00:05:12,745 Only then will you understand the true meaning 114 00:05:12,746 --> 00:05:14,914 of you're never gonna score. 115 00:05:16,617 --> 00:05:18,518 What was that? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. 116 00:05:18,519 --> 00:05:21,587 There is, like, a figure. It's jumping on you. 117 00:05:21,588 --> 00:05:22,956 - Whoa. - Really? 118 00:05:22,957 --> 00:05:25,624 The ghost is spanking his monkey. 119 00:05:25,625 --> 00:05:28,494 Eh, I think he's just, like, pointing to his schlong. 120 00:05:28,495 --> 00:05:30,396 He's like, heh, yeah, here it is. 121 00:05:30,397 --> 00:05:32,098 See that? 122 00:05:32,099 --> 00:05:33,666 Yeah, I got your spirit swinging. 123 00:05:33,667 --> 00:05:34,969 Come on. 124 00:05:35,069 --> 00:05:36,402 Come on, you dorks. 125 00:05:36,403 --> 00:05:39,138 You don't have to have bones to have a boner. 126 00:05:39,139 --> 00:05:40,440 Hey, look at that, huh? 127 00:05:40,441 --> 00:05:42,575 There's two of 'em? 128 00:05:42,576 --> 00:05:44,143 What are they doing? 129 00:05:44,144 --> 00:05:48,581 The time to sleep alone is every time for this dude. 130 00:05:52,819 --> 00:05:56,956 Uh, unexplained bang? 131 00:05:56,957 --> 00:05:58,758 I tell you, if this guy bangs anything, 132 00:05:58,759 --> 00:06:00,327 it's definitely gonna be unexplained. 133 00:06:00,427 --> 00:06:03,263 You know what I'm saying? He's a dork, this guy. 134 00:06:04,498 --> 00:06:06,232 This is it, Beavis. 135 00:06:06,233 --> 00:06:08,568 We're finally going to score, 136 00:06:08,669 --> 00:06:12,271 all thanks to our secret weapon of massay. 137 00:06:12,272 --> 00:06:14,874 You know, a lot of guys complain about not scoring. 138 00:06:14,875 --> 00:06:16,942 Well, we're going to do something about it. 139 00:06:16,943 --> 00:06:19,879 You know, um, my face is starting to feel a little bit 140 00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:23,415 better now-- 141 00:06:25,318 --> 00:06:26,554 Uh-- 142 00:06:26,654 --> 00:06:27,620 Now we are ready. 143 00:06:27,621 --> 00:06:29,055 Ugh. 144 00:06:34,127 --> 00:06:35,128 Ow. 145 00:06:35,129 --> 00:06:36,462 Eh, ow. 146 00:06:36,463 --> 00:06:37,663 Ugh. 147 00:06:37,664 --> 00:06:41,000 Butt-Head, is it working? 148 00:06:41,001 --> 00:06:42,368 I can't see anything. 149 00:06:42,369 --> 00:06:43,736 Uh, yeah. 150 00:06:43,737 --> 00:06:47,374 The chicks are already all over me. 151 00:06:47,375 --> 00:06:49,710 Hey, baby. 152 00:06:49,810 --> 00:06:51,078 First time at the mall? 153 00:06:52,379 --> 00:06:54,213 Yeah, that's cool, that's cool. 154 00:06:56,483 --> 00:06:57,517 Ah! 155 00:06:59,052 --> 00:07:01,021 Ow. 156 00:07:01,121 --> 00:07:02,621 Ow. 157 00:07:02,622 --> 00:07:03,857 Damn it. 158 00:07:03,858 --> 00:07:06,259 That chick was all stuck-up or something. 159 00:07:07,627 --> 00:07:08,995 Yeah, I haven't scored yet either. 160 00:07:08,996 --> 00:07:10,029 This sucks. 161 00:07:11,365 --> 00:07:12,765 I think you're not wearing enough cologne, 162 00:07:12,766 --> 00:07:15,169 and it's, like, messing up my game. 163 00:07:16,604 --> 00:07:18,638 You know, Butt-Head, actually, I'm not sure 164 00:07:18,738 --> 00:07:22,876 I want any more of that-- 165 00:07:25,012 --> 00:07:26,546 Whoa, check it out. 166 00:07:26,547 --> 00:07:29,349 There's a new nachos place at the food court. 167 00:07:29,449 --> 00:07:32,718 We should go eat there after we score. 168 00:07:32,719 --> 00:07:34,387 Ow! 169 00:07:36,123 --> 00:07:37,757 Get up, dumbass. 170 00:07:37,758 --> 00:07:40,861 How are you supposed to get chicks lying on the floor? 171 00:07:42,096 --> 00:07:44,498 Sorry, sorry. 172 00:07:44,598 --> 00:07:45,499 Hello, ladies. 173 00:07:48,369 --> 00:07:49,636 Ow, ow! 174 00:07:54,041 --> 00:07:55,908 [Kameron Marlowe's "Tequila Talkin'" 175 00:07:55,909 --> 00:07:58,411 ♪ But I had to come over and ask your name ♪ 176 00:07:58,412 --> 00:08:00,446 Ugh. Oh, boy. 177 00:08:00,447 --> 00:08:02,082 Yeah, yeah. 178 00:08:02,182 --> 00:08:05,818 Uh, hmm. 179 00:08:05,819 --> 00:08:08,154 That bartender's like, uh, miss? 180 00:08:08,155 --> 00:08:09,956 The stubby-fingered gentleman over there 181 00:08:09,957 --> 00:08:11,225 wants to talk to you. 182 00:08:13,493 --> 00:08:14,728 He's also the only other gentleman 183 00:08:14,828 --> 00:08:16,028 in this entire resort. 184 00:08:17,464 --> 00:08:19,031 It's actually not safe to be here, ma'am. 185 00:08:20,500 --> 00:08:21,869 There have been several incidents of creepy guys 186 00:08:21,969 --> 00:08:23,469 buying girls shots of tequila 187 00:08:23,470 --> 00:08:24,705 and then taking them out on a boat, 188 00:08:24,805 --> 00:08:26,039 so be very careful. 189 00:08:27,441 --> 00:08:29,842 ♪ That ain't the tequila talkin' ♪ 190 00:08:29,843 --> 00:08:33,045 It's not the tequila talking. 191 00:08:33,046 --> 00:08:34,414 But pretty soon, 192 00:08:34,515 --> 00:08:36,649 it's gonna be the police talking. 193 00:08:38,686 --> 00:08:41,020 ♪ Ain't the tequila talking ♪ 194 00:08:41,021 --> 00:08:43,523 You know, they make a pretty cute couple, 195 00:08:43,524 --> 00:08:45,958 you know, except for him. 196 00:08:45,959 --> 00:08:47,660 She's like, uh, hey, I'm in my bikini. 197 00:08:47,661 --> 00:08:49,229 Why don't you take your shirt off? 198 00:08:49,329 --> 00:08:52,197 And he's like, uh, I'm good. 199 00:08:52,198 --> 00:08:54,801 Yeah, I'm good. Maybe-- how about some more tequila? 200 00:08:56,169 --> 00:08:57,770 She's like, uh, 201 00:08:57,771 --> 00:09:00,506 how much longer does this video shoot go? 202 00:09:03,243 --> 00:09:05,545 Yeah, 'cause, I mean, I'm acting my ass off. 203 00:09:05,546 --> 00:09:06,947 Come on. 204 00:09:07,047 --> 00:09:08,380 I'm playing the woman 205 00:09:08,381 --> 00:09:10,182 who would ever touch you in a million years. 206 00:09:10,183 --> 00:09:12,952 And it ain't easy. 207 00:09:12,953 --> 00:09:15,522 ♪ Ain't the tequila talking ♪ 208 00:09:17,557 --> 00:09:18,892 Damn it, Beavis. 209 00:09:18,893 --> 00:09:21,861 We're all out of massay 'cause you used it all. 210 00:09:21,862 --> 00:09:23,730 Oh, yeah, yeah. 211 00:09:23,731 --> 00:09:25,698 Sorry about that. 212 00:09:25,699 --> 00:09:28,902 We gotta, like, find some more. 213 00:09:29,936 --> 00:09:33,206 Hey, we need some French cologne. 214 00:09:34,308 --> 00:09:36,542 Yeah, um, do you have Massoi? 215 00:09:37,811 --> 00:09:39,011 Would you like to sample this one? 216 00:09:39,012 --> 00:09:40,513 It's very nice. 217 00:09:40,514 --> 00:09:42,115 Uh, OK. 218 00:09:47,587 --> 00:09:50,957 Uh, this cologne doesn't work. 219 00:09:51,057 --> 00:09:52,892 It doesn't hurt at all. 220 00:09:52,893 --> 00:09:55,496 That's right, yeah. It does not hurt, yeah. 221 00:09:56,563 --> 00:09:58,465 Damn it. This sucks. 222 00:09:58,565 --> 00:10:01,701 Nice try ripping us off, butthole. 223 00:10:02,903 --> 00:10:04,904 I don't know, Butt-Head. 224 00:10:04,905 --> 00:10:07,641 I mean, it smells kind of good, you know? 225 00:10:07,741 --> 00:10:10,175 Like a tree or something. 226 00:10:10,176 --> 00:10:11,544 Damn it, Beavis. 227 00:10:11,545 --> 00:10:13,079 Chicks don't want a guy who smells like a tree. 228 00:10:13,080 --> 00:10:15,448 Chicks want a smell that says, 229 00:10:15,449 --> 00:10:18,284 "I'm willing to pay the price to score." 230 00:10:18,285 --> 00:10:20,252 Oh, yeah, yeah, right. 231 00:10:20,253 --> 00:10:21,888 Yeah, the smell of pain. 232 00:10:21,889 --> 00:10:23,423 Yeah. 233 00:10:23,424 --> 00:10:25,425 There must be a way that we can get more massay 234 00:10:25,426 --> 00:10:27,961 out of this stupid can. 235 00:10:28,061 --> 00:10:29,195 Uh, let's see. 236 00:10:29,196 --> 00:10:31,632 Uh, goo-fur-- 237 00:10:31,732 --> 00:10:32,631 words. 238 00:10:32,632 --> 00:10:35,302 Uh, he-ah--hea--heat. 239 00:10:36,370 --> 00:10:38,104 I think they want us to, like, 240 00:10:38,105 --> 00:10:39,372 heat it up or something. 241 00:10:39,373 --> 00:10:41,275 Yeah, yeah. Fire, yeah. 242 00:10:41,375 --> 00:10:43,877 Fire, yeah. 243 00:10:47,948 --> 00:10:50,383 Well, that ought to do it. 244 00:10:53,220 --> 00:10:56,856 Yeah, this was a really smart idea, Butt-Head. 245 00:10:58,425 --> 00:11:00,259 Whoa, cool. 246 00:11:00,260 --> 00:11:03,295 Yeah, yeah. Fire! 247 00:11:03,296 --> 00:11:05,765 There it is, yeah. 248 00:11:05,766 --> 00:11:07,433 On the floor! 249 00:11:07,434 --> 00:11:10,769 Uh, can you buttholes shut up? 250 00:11:10,770 --> 00:11:12,839 We're trying to put on some cologne. 251 00:11:15,108 --> 00:11:16,176 Whoa. 252 00:11:16,276 --> 00:11:17,944 They're spraying us with massay! 253 00:11:17,945 --> 00:11:19,912 Make sure you get some in my eyes. 254 00:11:19,913 --> 00:11:21,080 Ah!